Last Friday I was fortunate enough to spend an hour with two people that I have been blessed to know. I've only seen Teya a handful of times over the last five years but have watched her development with inspiration in my heart and a lump in my throat. Now she is a teenager filled with love, compassion, humour, sarcasm and a continual drive to achieve.
Her mother Jeanette has more on her plate than any of us can imagine. But as she has taught me, the higher your obstacles and challenges, the more opportunity you have for victory and success, both big and small.
For those who haven't met Teya...
B
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Tears Of Joy
The one thing all warring countries seem to have in common...is the love for their children. I can't help but think that if we could ALL tap into the emotion of this video, nobody would ever pick up a gun again.
Enjoy!
Enjoy!
Monday, March 15, 2010
Easier Said Than Done?
“Before you decide how to treat someone, image you were them.” – Justin Cohen
I came across that quote yesterday while browsing the web and it stuck in my head. A simple concept but perhaps a difficult thing to actually execute.
The rest of my weekend was partially spent focused on my father who is very close to the end of his run with us as he tiredly struggles through the last part of a 14 year battle with Parkinsons.
Watching someone as they prepare to pass-on is an interesting process. And watching the way their surviving friends and family deal with the situation can be equally fascinating. My younger sister seems most hit by this anticipated event. She is crushed and mourning even before Dad has taken his last breath. She will have a major hole in her life that she is already feeling, and her pain seems…deeper than mine. I will miss my Dad, no question. But he and my sister had a much closer relationship than with any of the other children. A closeness that I never knew and therefore a sense of loss I will not know.
And truth be told, I cannot help but slip into judgment of her on occasion as she sits nervously in the chair by the hospital bed emotional and cranky and irritable. How can I relate to my sister now, when all these years she had the golden spoon handed to her and only her. We are now so different.
Then last night I was reading a book to my daughter and cuddling her before she fell asleep. I lay on the floor beside her filled with the very special love she and I have…and it hit me. This is not about me understanding my sister.
It’s about me understanding a daughter.
“Before you decide how to treat someone, image you were them.”
Thank you Justin.
B
I came across that quote yesterday while browsing the web and it stuck in my head. A simple concept but perhaps a difficult thing to actually execute.
The rest of my weekend was partially spent focused on my father who is very close to the end of his run with us as he tiredly struggles through the last part of a 14 year battle with Parkinsons.
Watching someone as they prepare to pass-on is an interesting process. And watching the way their surviving friends and family deal with the situation can be equally fascinating. My younger sister seems most hit by this anticipated event. She is crushed and mourning even before Dad has taken his last breath. She will have a major hole in her life that she is already feeling, and her pain seems…deeper than mine. I will miss my Dad, no question. But he and my sister had a much closer relationship than with any of the other children. A closeness that I never knew and therefore a sense of loss I will not know.
And truth be told, I cannot help but slip into judgment of her on occasion as she sits nervously in the chair by the hospital bed emotional and cranky and irritable. How can I relate to my sister now, when all these years she had the golden spoon handed to her and only her. We are now so different.
Then last night I was reading a book to my daughter and cuddling her before she fell asleep. I lay on the floor beside her filled with the very special love she and I have…and it hit me. This is not about me understanding my sister.
It’s about me understanding a daughter.
“Before you decide how to treat someone, image you were them.”
Thank you Justin.
B
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Mom Was Right
Growing up I had stars in my eyes as I imagined a life as an actor and director...and my mother always told me I was living in a dream world.
Turns out she was right.
Here is Harvard Psychologist Dan Gilbert discussing the concept of Synthetic Happiness.
It's a 20 minute talk but VERY interesting.
http://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_we_happy.html
B
Turns out she was right.
Here is Harvard Psychologist Dan Gilbert discussing the concept of Synthetic Happiness.
It's a 20 minute talk but VERY interesting.
http://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_we_happy.html
B
Sunday, March 7, 2010
The Guardian
As a parent of two little girls I constantly find myself walking the line between teaching and learning.
The tricky part of the process is that you're bringing your baggage to the table. All the hurt, failure and disappointment that everyone MUST experience as part of their journey, is exactly the thing I want my kids to avoid. I find myself slipping into control mode to "help them" make it through the day unscathed both physically and emotionally. I can't even imagine the teenage dating days ahead. It will break my heart...when someone breaks their heart.
But I've realized this mindset puts too much focus on what they CAN'T do or what might go wrong. Not the best plan to allow someone to flourish. And the reality is that all those negative experiences we have all struggled through, just made the victories that much sweeter. I wouldn't change a thing in my life, so why am I trying to change things in theirs?
Turns out it's not them I've been trying to protect.
It's me.
B
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGODurRfVv4&feature=player_embedded
The tricky part of the process is that you're bringing your baggage to the table. All the hurt, failure and disappointment that everyone MUST experience as part of their journey, is exactly the thing I want my kids to avoid. I find myself slipping into control mode to "help them" make it through the day unscathed both physically and emotionally. I can't even imagine the teenage dating days ahead. It will break my heart...when someone breaks their heart.
But I've realized this mindset puts too much focus on what they CAN'T do or what might go wrong. Not the best plan to allow someone to flourish. And the reality is that all those negative experiences we have all struggled through, just made the victories that much sweeter. I wouldn't change a thing in my life, so why am I trying to change things in theirs?
Turns out it's not them I've been trying to protect.
It's me.
B
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGODurRfVv4&feature=player_embedded
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Tickling The Ivory
So what do you do if you're 90, and you're sitting in the hospital with time to kill between appointments?
Marlow: "I saw that piano and it said if you'd like to play it...and I touched the key and I thought... WOW! Now THAT's a piano."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RI-l0tK8Ok0
Marlow: "I saw that piano and it said if you'd like to play it...and I touched the key and I thought... WOW! Now THAT's a piano."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RI-l0tK8Ok0
Contagious
For the last couple of years I have been taking public transit to work every morning and home every night, and about six months ago it dawned on me as I was looking at the faces of my co-riders...nobody seems happy.
Almost everyone has a sorrowful, Debbie Downer expression. Pinched eyebrows, unfocused gazes... I'm never sure if it's a result of where they've come from or where they're headed, but I do know at that very moment they are not happy. Or is this their natural expression. Have the events of their lives weathered them to the point that their natural look is a sad, angry, depressed one? Are you one of them? Am I?
One day out a mix of curiosity and boredom, I tried this little experiment that turned out to be not only a great time killer but it put me in an awesome mood and started me off on a great day. I looked at the sower-pusses one by one, and imagined them with an ear-to-ear smile. Or actually in the midst of a joyful belly laugh. These are complete strangers who I don't know, and probably never will, but just the idea of seeing them filled with humour and joy...made me feel happy and positive.
Which proves to me it's an emotion that is easily transferable.
You should try it sometime and see if it works.
Here's a great video that proves the point!
B
Almost everyone has a sorrowful, Debbie Downer expression. Pinched eyebrows, unfocused gazes... I'm never sure if it's a result of where they've come from or where they're headed, but I do know at that very moment they are not happy. Or is this their natural expression. Have the events of their lives weathered them to the point that their natural look is a sad, angry, depressed one? Are you one of them? Am I?
One day out a mix of curiosity and boredom, I tried this little experiment that turned out to be not only a great time killer but it put me in an awesome mood and started me off on a great day. I looked at the sower-pusses one by one, and imagined them with an ear-to-ear smile. Or actually in the midst of a joyful belly laugh. These are complete strangers who I don't know, and probably never will, but just the idea of seeing them filled with humour and joy...made me feel happy and positive.
Which proves to me it's an emotion that is easily transferable.
You should try it sometime and see if it works.
Here's a great video that proves the point!
B
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Perspective
It's easy to let the stress of our days as responsible adults bog us down.
I'm in the process of launching a successful start-up business and dealing with the ebb and flow of both personal and business finances, incredible deadlines, very long work hours that deny me the time I wish I could spend with my family, pressure to deliver, planning for our company's growth while keeping an eye on my blood pressure...on top of keeping up with the needs of our kids at home and striving to provide for them while instilling the right life values. Geez, that's a lot!
So when my wife calls me in tears I stop working and prepare to deal with whatever the issue is.
In this case it was the report card of our grade one daughter. But the tears...were of joy.
"She is a role model of kindness and empathy to others".
All is right in the world.
B
I'm in the process of launching a successful start-up business and dealing with the ebb and flow of both personal and business finances, incredible deadlines, very long work hours that deny me the time I wish I could spend with my family, pressure to deliver, planning for our company's growth while keeping an eye on my blood pressure...on top of keeping up with the needs of our kids at home and striving to provide for them while instilling the right life values. Geez, that's a lot!
So when my wife calls me in tears I stop working and prepare to deal with whatever the issue is.
In this case it was the report card of our grade one daughter. But the tears...were of joy.
"She is a role model of kindness and empathy to others".
All is right in the world.
B
Monday, March 1, 2010
Another Reason To Be Proud
Coming off a VERY successful showing at the 2010 Winter Olympics, it's easy to be proud of our country and our athletes. It's also easy to erase the division of borders and appreciate ALL the athletes from all the countries who dedicated themselves to personal bests.
This morning I discovered another reason to not only be proud of the country I live in, but part of a compassionate world.
This is the French Canadian charity "Clowns Without Borders" helping to put smiles back on the faces of the children of Haiti.
Enjoy.
This morning I discovered another reason to not only be proud of the country I live in, but part of a compassionate world.
This is the French Canadian charity "Clowns Without Borders" helping to put smiles back on the faces of the children of Haiti.
Enjoy.
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